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Giving & Receiving

Updated: Dec 9, 2020

Giving and receiving are best experienced when both are in a state of balance. Some of us find it much easier to give than to receive. We might be a natural helper who automatically lends a hand, no questions asked. Pure love is a willingness to give without a thought of receiving anything in return. But when it comes to receiving, well, that's a whole other thing. Perfect example, when we need help with something (but won't admit it for various reasons) and hesitate to ask. Many of us do not feel comfortable asking for help from others. Help to have something repaired or fixed. Help to have the right resource or referral for the right person who can do the job. Why is it that we don't request assistance or ask for help? For some of us, we have ego, our pride, and we are not comfortable feeling vulnerable to ask for help. It can be very uncomfortable to ask for help because we don't want to get rejected if we were to make a request. And for many of us, we simply do not want to burden anyone.

I've seemed to notice, it seems to come more natural for givers to ask for help. I know for myself, whenever I needed something or someone's assistance, help was always there. I like to think this is because when someone asks for my help with something, such as for a resource, referral, my knowledge or insight, I generally assist in whatever way I can. It seems to come full circle - you give something, you need something and ask and receive; someone asks you for something, you give and so it flows and repeats.

Here are some tips that can help with learning to feel comfortable with both giving and receiving:

  • Ask can you help me? It is ok to ask for help. It isn't easy, but stepping out of your comfort zone and asking for help from friends, family, co-workers can be an uplifting experience. You might just realize they are thrilled you asked for help and that they find it rewarding because they feel so good inside. Tip: Try to recall a time when a friend or family member asked you for help. It may have been to just listen or it could have been to lend a hand or take care of an errand they needed assistance with. Your brief time/help in the matter might have meant a great deal to them and really made a difference in their day. How did you feel, knowing that your help meant so much to them? It can be a rewarding feeling when we give. So, next time you need help, step out of your comfort zone and make a request and just know that the giver will feel happy to help.

  • When giving and receiving are in equal balance this creates more meaningful relationships with those we love and care about. When requesting assistance or asking for help, think about how you might want to phrase your request; consider suggesting a time that is convenient for the other person who will be helping you. Tip: It might help you feel more comfortable to suggest (or ask) when you can return the favor and assist them with something or ask if there is anything you can help them with.

  • As the saying goes, be a reflection of what you'd like to receive. Tip: Want to feel appreciated? Want more love? If you feel you need to feel appreciated, show or tell someone that you appreciate them. If you want love, give love. If you want respect, give respect. What you share and give out, will be returned for you to receive.

Make a positive intention to give love, be love and receive love. Give generously and receive generously.

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