• Nancy Hovde

Adjusting To Life's Changes

Updated: Aug 1, 2019

It may seem challenging at first, but learning how to better adapt to change can improve all aspects of our lives.


When we are in a happy situation and life is going smoothly, it is important to appreciate that time of joy. While we shouldn't live in anxiety, fearing that our happiness will be pulled out from under us, knowing that everything changes, will keep us from being caught off-guard. A completely unexpected change may throw us for a short time, but we soon recover because we know we can eventually adapt. Resilience is key.

When Plan A doesn't seem to be happening or working out right, how fast do we adapt to Plan B? I'm not referring to huge, life-encompassing situations, but those small changes that we can learn to cope with easily.

Some people are able to organize their thoughts in ways that generate appropriate and positive actions. Adaptive abilities are necessary as changes occur within our circumstances and us. Adaptive behavior includes skills that allow us to be flexible when change occurs in our personal lives.

When we are adaptive, we react to unexpected events in creative or constructive ways. We can learn to be adaptive and refocus our mind in new directions and make choices based on the desired outcome. When we are open to change, we know it is the set of the sail that matters—not the direction of the wind.

Here are a few tips on how to adapt to change:

  • Look beneath the surface. Welcoming challenges allows you the opportunity to grow wiser and more skillful. Perhaps someone you know has successfully dealt with the same situation? Try seeking out a conversation with someone you trust. Even circumstances that seem most frustrating carry within them a new blessing, and when you search for the blessing, you will usually find it. This can be very enlightening.

  • Staying in the present moment can help you conquer any fear. It's far too easy for your mind to get caught up with regrets about the past or worries about the future. I have found that when I have moments of self-doubt, I focus only on whatever I am doing at the moment. I realize this moment is all I have right now—I may as well enjoy it!

  • Try to reflect on some of the past changes you've gone through in your life. Include both the positive outcomes and the negative ones. Regardless of your past, it's likely that you've learned an important life lesson. You may actually want to seek change. I have found that when I keep my life stagnant, I seem to lose out on many important life experiences that offer valuable life lessons.

  • Did you know that writing down your innermost thoughts provides a similar release as confiding with a close friend? Change can be scary, but if you provide yourself with a way to conquer the fear, you can find the courage within you.

  • With a willingness to find positive solutions or outcomes, try to compromise and find ways around problems or situations brought about by change. But, never just give up without proactively trying to manage the situation to your advantage.

  • When you move forward with a change in your life, think it through in a positive way. Instead of thinking about what could go wrong, picture it all going right.

Recognizing that everything eventually changes also provides some evenness to our lives. We're not riding an emotional roller coaster of highs and lows—everything averages out in the end. We're grateful for and appreciate the good times, but we don't let the bad times drag us too far down. Change seems to find us one way or another, and we can learn how to go with the flow and how to let go. It may seem challenging at first, but learning how to better adapt to change can improve all aspects of our lives. Contact me if you are going through some challenges and could use some guidance with creating an action plan that will help you succeed!

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Please email me at nancyhovde@gmail.com

Redondo Beach, CA USA 

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